


Too late

by syriala



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, M/M, Suicide Attempt, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-27
Updated: 2013-04-27
Packaged: 2017-12-09 16:03:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/776087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syriala/pseuds/syriala
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Closing the gates of hell demanded a sacrifice from heaven. Could they actually do that? Major character death, mentions of suicide, Destiel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Too late

Too late

 

The prophet was dead. 

Crowley had killed Kevin to stop him from telling the Winchesters the last trial to close the gates of hell. But he had been too late. Kevin had finished translating the tablet minutes before Crowley had arrived and they knew what to do. 

And during his last days Kevin had also translated the angel tablet and he found out how to close the gates of heaven. Which after everything the angels, and especially Naomi did, did not seem as such a bad idea. 

And this was for once surprisingly easy, because closing the gates of hell meant closing the gates of heaven since the angels walked only on earth to keep the demons at bay. 

No more demons, no more angels. 

The difficult part was to complete the trial. Because they had to sacrifice something from heaven and angels were not easy to come by. They were still discussing how to do that. 

“So basically that means we have to kill an angel, right?” Sam looked expectantly at Cas for further explanations. “Not necessarily. I think it means sacrificing something angelic and that would include the grace. Not the vessel, just the grace.” 

Dean laughed bitterly. “So we have to make an angel fall willingly. Great. Where would we find one who would do that?” Cas and Sam both stared at him. 

“Don’t you dare say that. Don’t you even think about that.” He turned to Cas. “You are not doing this for us. No way.” 

“Dean,” Cas started gently, “you are not going to find another angel who is willing to do that.” 

“I don’t,” Dean began but then he took a deep breath. “Will you excuse us for a second?”, he turned to Sam and as he nodded he took Castiel at the arm and dragged him to the other side of the clearing where they had found Kevin. 

“You are not going to do this”, Dean said, voice carefully controlled. “You will not sacrifice another thing for us.” 

“This doesn’t make a difference, Dean. My powers are already so weak; it won’t be much of a change.” Dean stopped his triad before he even started. That was new to him. 

“What do you mean our powers are weak? You said you were fine.” 

“I am fine. I’m just not that mighty anymore. And I want to do this, Dean.” 

Dean let out a bitter laugh. “You want to give up your home, your family? I don’t think so.” 

“And why not, Dean?” Dean could tell he really got angry now. “Why would I want to belong to them? After everything they have done to me? They punished me for my doubts and feelings, they make me kill innocent brothers, they brainwashed me! Why would I ever want to go back to that?” 

Cas stared at Dean, but he couldn’t hold his gaze. 

“And what did we make you do? You rebelled for us, you killed your brothers for us and you died so often. How is that better than what they did to you? And they are your family, Cas.” It hurt Dean to say that but it was true, wasn’t it? 

Cas took a step back. “You once said that we were family,” Cas pointed out, pain very clearly in his voice, “you said that I was needed here, that you….needed me.” 

Dean briefly closed his eyes at those words. He did need Cas but he could not let his feelings come in between this. If they were to solve this whole supernatural crap he would make sure that Cas wouldn’t have to suffer anymore. He wanted him in a better place. 

“And what good would it ever do to you if you stayed here? You said it yourself once, for humans there is nothing but pain and regret, guilt and confusion. You want to live with that for the rest of your life when you could have a peaceful eternity in heaven?” 

Cas looked wide-eyed at him. “I don’t want an eternity in heaven, Dean.” 

Dean’s heart sped up a bit at those words. He cursed himself. That was not right. Cas would not give up the last thing he had. No way. 

“And I don’t want you to stay here on earth”, he shouted at Cas. 

Cas’ face didn’t change but still Dean could see how that broke something in him. His first instinct was to take it back, to comfort him but he couldn’t. 

He could not have this angel, who already gave so much, sacrifice his place in heaven for his sake. Cas deserved so much better. So much better than him. 

“You don’t mean that”, Cas said after a few minutes. Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. “You don’t mean this”, Cas said again, more confident now. “This is you trying to push the people you care about away.” 

“And what if it is?”, Dean asked tiredly. “It doesn’t make a difference.” He started to walk past Cas. “I won’t let you do it.” 

He was already behind Cas when he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder and was yanked around. “You are not deciding this for me, Dean”, Cas snapped and his voice trembled with anger. “You are not telling me what to do with my life!” 

“Look around you, Cas,” Dean hissed, with just as much anger as Cas. “Do you really want to stay in this godforsaken world? Where pain and war is a daily business? Really?” 

Cas eyes softened as he hold Dean’s gaze. “I just want to stay with you.” 

Dean’s mind went blank and his body reacted on its own. He closed the distance between them and kissed Cas. 

Cas seemed to be surprised for a split second but then he laid a hand on Dean’s hip and returned the kiss. 

It was filled with desperation and fear of what would happen, and these were not the things Dean had wanted for their first kiss, but he guessed under these circumstances that was ok. 

When they finally pulled apart they were both breathing hard and Dean felt a bit dizzy. He rested his forehead agains Cas’ who still had a hand clutched at his hip. 

“Stay, then?” he asked a bit unsure because he still felt that that was too much to ask, even though Cas had just gladly returned the kiss. 

Cas sighed and Dean could feel the air brush over his mouth. It sent shivers down his spine. 

“Of course, Dean.” Dean could almost hear the little smile in his voice. 

He himself smiled widely. Not only did Cas really want to stay, he also wanted to stay with him. 

Cas stepped slowly away from Dean. “Come on. Sam has waited long enough.” Right. Little brother on the other side. Dean grinned widely and lightly touched Cas’ hand. 

“Yeah, lets go.” 

 

“So how do we do this?”, Dean asked. 

Sam had eyed them curiously when they came back and of course he noted the closeness between them, but he hadn’t said a thing. Which Dean was grateful for. They could have as many chick-flick moments they wanted, once the gates were closed. 

“You have to rip my grace out of me”, Cas said matter-of-factly. 

“Whoa, what?” Dean turned to Cas. “I thought you were just going to give it up?” 

“I am. But in order for Sam to complete the trial he has to rip out a grace that is given willingly.” Dean took a deep breath and turned back to Sam. Rip out had not a pleasant ring to it. 

“Okay, how do I do that?” Cas stepped closer to Sam and opened his shirt. 

“I will manifest a part of my grace here. You will recite the right words and then you will be able to grab it and pull it out of me.” 

Cas locked eyes with Dean. “This will not be pleasant to watch.” 

“Don’t care.” Cas nodded and Sam started the incantation. Cas’ torso started to shine and he gave Sam a sign when it was time. Sam’s hand shot out and it looked like it would go right into Cas’ body. Both groaned. 

Sam began to pull his hand back and breathed heavily with the effort. Cas now groaned in pain and bend slightly over. He faltered. Dean was instantly at his side stabilizing him with one hand. 

Sam made a final move and with a cry he pulled his hand and the light in it away from Cas. Cas also let out a cry but it was one of pure agony. When Sam stumbled back both of them fell to the ground. 

Dean went down with Cas. He breathed way to fast and Dean could feel how his heart raced. Other than that he seemed okay. 

“Cas?”, Dean asked. “Fine”, he hissed. 

Dean turned his concentration on Sam who still had a glowing lightball in his hand. Dean tried to not avert his eyes, after all that right there was a part of Cas, but his eyes started to water and he had to turn away. 

He heard how Sam got the paper Kevin wrote for them out and then Sam started reading. When he finished, the grace disappeared and Sam fell to the side. Dean was with him a second later. 

“Sam?” he asked, worry in his voice. Before they had started this Sam had promised that he would be fine. This didn’t look like fine. His breathing was shallow and his heartbeat erratic. No way that was normal. 

“Sammy?”, Dean tried again but Sam had closed his eyes in pain. He had clutched a hand over his heart. “Sammy”, Dean shouted. 

In the meantime Cas had made his way over to them and was now kneeling besides them. 

“What’s wrong with him?”, he shot a pleading look at Cas. He just shook his head. “I don’t know.” 

Sam groaned in pain again and Dean felt so damn helpless. He searched his brother for obvious wounds but there was nothing. Finally Sam opened his eyes. 

“Heart attack”, he pressed out. 

Dean’s body went cold. His brother could not have a heart attack. He was a healthy man in his thirties, no way he had a heart attack. 

But apparently it was because the heart stopped right under Deans’ hands. 

“Sam”, he shouted and shook his brother violently. “Dean”, Cas said soothingly but Dean didn’t even notice. He started CPR bit it did not work. His brother’s heart stayed still. He fell back on his heels and cradled his brother in his lap. 

“Sammy”, he sobbed but his brother couldn’t answer anymore.

 

“Hello boys”, a voice suddenly said. 

Dean lifted his head only to see Crowley stand in front of them. “Oh no sorry, it’s just the one boy. Moose didn’t make it, did he?” 

Cas moved a bit so that he was standing in front of Dean and Sam and Dean tried to get to his gun but it was difficult to move with the weight in his lap. 

“Crowley”, Dean spat out, “you’re too late. We closed the gates.” 

“I noticed. And was it worth it, Dean?” Crowley shot a meaningful look at Sam. Dean had finally reached his gun but one flick of Crowleys’ hand and it flew away, just out of reach. 

“You will be sucked back into hell”, Cas said calmly. Crowley looked at him. 

“I know. I just stopped by to say farewell and to make sure Dean will never forget me.” He suddenly had an angel blade in his hand. Dean’s heart stopped again. 

“You know what I like most about humans, Dean? They are so easy to hurt. So quick to die.” 

And with those words he sunk the blade into Cas’ chest. 

“No”, Dean screamed but it was too late. Crowley had already disappeared and Cas fell to his knees, hands clutched around the hilt of the blade. 

Dean stumbled to his feet only to fall down besides Cas. “Cas”, he whispered. 

Cas tore his eyes away from the blade and looked at Dean. There was blood coming out of his mouth. 

“Cas, no”, Dean sobbed and his hands trembled as he clutched his shoulders. 

“We’ll get you to a hospital. You just have to hold on a little longer.” 

But it was too late. Always too late. 

The light had already left Cas’ eyes and his body slumped against him. Dean put his arms around the lifeless body and cried. 

Finally he laid Cas gently down on the ground and looked over to Sam. 

He quickly went through all the options he had. After a few minutes his mind went blank and his body numb. He felt like he was falling. 

There was nothing he could do. No way out. 

Crowley had confirmed that the gates were closed so there was no one on earth, no angel and no demon, who had the power to bring them back. Dean couldn’t make another deal with a crossroads demon and no angelic power would bring them back to him. 

His hand moved on its own accord and when he lowered his gaze he saw his gun. 

He looked forth between Sam’ and Cas’ bodies and there was only pain and desperation. 

This was not how it was supposed to go. They had wanted to close the gates so that they could live a normal live away from hunting and monsters. Sam could have gone back to Amelia and Cas would have lived in the bunker, with him. They could have shared a life. 

Dean started crying again but he wasn’t aware of that. 

He crawled over to Sam and brushed a few strands of hair out of his face and then he kissed his forehead. “I’m sorry, Sammy”, he whispered with a broken voice. 

He turned back to Cas who still had his eyes open. Dean carefully closed them. He put a light kiss to his lips. “I’m so sorry.” 

Finally he lifted the gun to his head.


End file.
